Friday 16 July 2010

Oh, Baby!

Lately I have been congratulating myself for raising two children to adulthood. I followed all the guidelines of the time for healthy pregnancies and babies, but apparently I was misguided. It seems my children were exposed to a minefield of dangers.

If I were a new mother today, I would know better than to use a bumper pad on the baby's crib. When my children were infants, I was told to use them to protect their heads from banging against the crib bars. I noticed they liked to burrow the crowns of their tiny heads into the corners of the bumper, perhaps to simulate the coziness of the womb.

Who knew that the bumper, usually a part of a crib set that sets the theme for a nursery, was potentially lethal? Today, bumpers are thought to threaten the possible suffocation of a baby by not allowing enough air to circulate in the crib.

We were told to place our babies on their sides or stomachs when sleeping, but never on their backs. Why not? If they spit up, they might choke on the contents. Today's mothers are told to put their babies to sleep on their backs only, never on their stomachs. Why not? They might suffocate.

While nursing my babies I was told to drink beer to produce more abundant and richer milk. I am not a fan of beer, but I dutifully forced down one a day so my babies would reap the benefits. Today, that same act might be considered reckless endangerment to my child.

I didn't know that plastic bottles might contain harmful chemicals. Some primal instinct did keep me from ever warming them in the microwave, though. Whew.

Who knew that I should have used only organic crib sheets? Isn't cotton by its very nature organic?

Why didn't I realize that the beautiful organza-skirted bassinet was a potential danger because it might collapse? I still have never heard of one that did, but shouldn't I have researched bassinet makers and checked their safety records?

Today's expectant mother is told to steer clear of any renovation, sanding, or painting. They might pose a risk to the baby. I remember being in full nesting mode and having the nursery and trim on the outside of the house painted. There was also a deck added to the back of the house. How could I have been so careless?

Modern mothers are advised to avoid gardening within three feet of their home's foundation if it was built before 1978. I have no idea why. All I know is I should have used a measuring tape before planting those impatiens in the front yard.

And, oh! The other sins I unknowingly committed: Eating off of ceramic plates that were not certified lead-free. Wearing nail polish. Highlighting my hair. Eating soft cheese and tuna fish sandwiches (with mayo!). Partaking of caffeine. Taking clothes to the dry cleaners. Spritzing a little cologne here and there.

Given everything I did that would make today's young mother report me to social services, you can understand why I am so relieved that my babies survived infancy and childhood and grew to be healthy adults.

One more thing: I have always been a fanatic about clean drinking water. I never gave them anything but bottled (in glass) water that I had researched and determined to be clean. I felt good about that.

Later I learned the clean bottled water deprived them of the fluoride found in tap water, which may have contributed to a cavity or two. Even my best efforts were flawed.

I take comfort in the knowledge that our own parents and grandparents unknowingly did worse things (smoking, drinking, painting, eating deli meat, using cribs with wide slats, not using car seats or seat belts), and somehow we made it to adulthood.

The will to survive apparently survives parents.